You know you’re losing touch
You know you’re losing touch with someone when you find out they are getting married via there blog. I could cry but I’ve resigned myself to becoming selfish and will not let someone else destroy my positive week. I’ve learned from way too many failed friendships and sadly enough from my father’s lovely example of fatherhood, that you shouldnt expect much from people. Trust is not a given. With me it must be earned over and over again for me to believe that you are truly in it for the long haul. It’s sad when the one person you thought would always be there isnt anymore. I am coming to grips with the idea that I must not be a very good person to be friends with. I now have no close friends cept my hubby and am resigned to spend my girl chats w/ my mom. I dont mind that so much but it is a painful reminder how sad and pitiful I am at relationships. But like I said, why ruin a good week with negativity?
I am spending the day solo, which doesnt help me feel anymore alone than possible. I am actually enjoying it. Still in my jammies and it’s almost 4 pm. I’ve been doing laundry, dishes, baking cookies and watching Lifetime movies. Ah…it takes me back to lazy Sunday afternoons as a teen. But back then I’d have a girlfriend to hang out with.
Two more days to my first day of work. I dont know how its possible but I am excited and upset about it all at the same time. I am missing Calebs lots today as he’s out with Dean, but it might be good for him to get used to being away from me, and me from him. I think it will be lots harder for me though!
Well back to enjoying my lazy Saturday…
