My hubby has time to sit and search the net and “learn” things. To seek things out for himself. I barely have time to check my email and read the blogs I have in my bookmarks. A few weeks ago he introduced me to podcasts, a great idea I think(even though it still takes his downloading them for me onto his mp3 player…but at least I am trying to get interested) this week I’m struggling to figure out the difference between emergent and postmodern on my own. Dean is out there and getting connected with people while I am sitting at home w/ two kids. Seems unfair, I figure the least I can do is get informed so I can at least hold up my end of the conversations that Dean gets me into about things I have no clue about. Found this article today, it was interested…from what I briefly read…as if I had time to read the whole article……oh well I guess all that matters for me right now is that I got the laundry caught up, the front grass cut and the house semi-clean again. One day, years from now maybe I’ll be social again and be able to introduce new things and ideas to Dean instead of vice versa…I cant wait til that day comes. Believe it or not I have dreams and visions for my future that dont include always changing diapers and cleaning house; ONE day I’ll pursue them but for today I guess I’ll be happy that I accomplished my goals for today.
My littlest guy is sick, well seems like all my boys are sick actually. The one thats given me the most trouble about it today is the little one, poor Boaz. He has been running a 100.1 temp off and on since yesterday, has a runny nose and a cough. He was sleepy a lot yesterday and somewhat whiney considering he hardly cries. Today he’s been crying A LOT. He screams even. I dont know if it’s just teething (since Caleb never fussed when he got teeth, even as an infant) or if it’s the cold. I’m really worried it’s an ear infection and cold but I convinced myself to wait it out a little longer. I know he’s sick because it actually took needing a pacifier in his mouth to get him to sleep. He never uses a paci, ever. If he’s not better tomorrow He’ll be going to the dr. we’ve got a lot of plans for the next 5 days and really cant afford for everyone to be sick. somehow I’m the only one not having the cold symptoms, but I guess my body has enough going on!! plus one of us needs to be able to take care of the rest of the gang. please pray for all of us!!
I know I’m not really a “new” mom since Caleb is almost 4 but I’m “new” to the mom of two thing. there are days when I wonder if I am going to get through the day on my own w/ the kids. This morning I was trying to figure out who I was going to call to help me. Ironically twice this week I’ve been told I’m a very patient and calm mother. I always think people are crazy when they say things like that. Where are they when I’m in tears or feeling so bad that all I want and need to do is sleep. I guess it’s nice that people think I am doing good adjusting to two being a mom to two kids, and I know that I am doing good considering. I know I should be glad others think so highly of my mothering, especially on days like today when I think there’s no way I can do it alone.
Speaking of doing it alone, Dean was home for dinner and then left to go out leaving me again. I really hate when that happens, but I know he needs to get out and away from things. I guess I just wish I could get out and do things on my own. I have a meeting tomorrow night and I think I am seriously not taking the baby. there’s only one way he’ll learn to take a bottle and thats if he has to. Plus I want to go out by myself for once. I can always dream cant I!
Sometimes I wonder why doctors go to years of school. I called my endo today because I was feeling bad, started getting really faint yesterday and today. This is a new symptom, as if I need anymore symptoms. He is stumped of course. He told me to wait it out, my next appt is in a week. he says if anything gets worse than I’ll need to be seen. I think if I stil feel dizzy tomorrow I’m going to my primary care to get my blood pressure checked at least. Last week in the drs office it was 172 over something….this was after sitting there for 30 minutes doing nothing. before I left the drs office it was done to 145/95 which still isnt that great. He said he doesnt want to treat that problem until the thyroid levels normalize so who knows how long that will be. In the meantime I’m just supposed to struggle with feeling bad and trying to take care of the kids. (and worry of course)
I cant believe I totally forgot to make a big deal out of Bo turning 5 months old. I guess w/ feeling bad I forgot. I’ve been telling people he’s 5 months too for the last week since it was easier than saying 4 weeks 4 months, cause thats really just 5 months just not to the day. He’s getting to be so independent. He loves the exersaucer, and if you try to hold him he’ll try to stand and/or bounce as if he’s in the exersaucer. he still prefers to be on his own, laying down or now his new thing is trying to sit up alone. He loves to roll now, he can go front - back and back-front pretty easily. He really wants to be able to sit up by himself and will sit forward in the high chair and the car seat and gets mad that he cant sit up in your lap. He’s able to scoot himself around to different places. It’s so fun to watch him do so many new things but it’s also sad to see him becoming not so “babyish”" Anothere one of his loves is his big brother. Just now Caleb walked away from him and he started crying but when he saw Caleb again he laughed. If Bo is sad Caleb can almost always make him laugh. speaking of him being sad…I have to run…Caleb abandoned him for his chicken nuggets and smiley face taters…..
Pics from this week
Caleb took this pic of me when I got home from the womens retreat on 4.17, I think it’s a pretty good pic, considering the age of the photographer!
the boys were happy to see each other after having been apart all weekend
This is another reason why I love naptime in our house. it’s too sweet to see the boys like this.
Boaz was trying so hard to sit up while we were away so I took a pic so Dean could see. since we’ve been home all week he’s tried even harder to sit on his own. It’s fun to watch but he gets so frustrated when he cant do it by himself.
Barbie Cake
This is how I spent my Friday night:
