As a kid you love snow days, you never think about how it affects your parents. As a mom I hate snow days, and of course the kiddo loves snow. If it wasnt snowing so hard right now I’d take the boy out in it, but he’ll have to wait for daddy to get home, if and when that ever happens. At least this time they didnt bother to ask Dean to stay at a hotel overnight to insure that he’d be at work tomorrow, I’m mad enough he’s still at work. I’m going to worry until he steps foot inside the house. I hate snow, it’s pretty if you can sit inside all day and snuggle with the ones you love, but I’ve only got 2/3 of the people I want to snuggle with. I’m hoping it snows enough to keep the other one home tomorrow but I know it wont happen.
I’ve been reading some peoples blogs who I used to be very close with but no longer talk to. For some reason I feel like I’m spying on them. I have no problem reading complete strangers blogs but it feels odd being able to check in on people I still care for to see whats going on in there lives even though I dont see or talk to them anymore. Not that its completely my fault I’m not talking to them, I’ve done my part to mend things with them but for some of them they just dont want to be a part of my life. Thats fine and although I dont understand their feelings or reasonings I accept that they have closed the door to our friendship, I just wish that I didnt still care so deeply for people so that I could close the door. I have this thing about not giving up on people, and luckily in the past it’s helped me be able to regain old friendships. I think the hardest part right now is not understanding why someone wont forgive me for something I did a long time ago, especially when what I did didnt involve them. Argh. I’m all emotion today about it and not sure why. May have to do with the amazing time I spent with my church family today at a going away luncheon for a family in our life group. It reminds me of the friends I moved away and left. Now that I’m back “home” I’ve found new relationships that are amazing, but it still is hard to look back at the past sometimes and wonder what might have been if time and distance hadnt gotten in the way of things. Life is hard, friendship is hard.
Caleb getting ready to play in the snow.
Boaz in his sled today, 2.25.05
I cant wait til next year when Boaz can really enjoy the snow, for now he’s just indulging us and letting us enjoy seeing him with his big brother out in it.
Last night we bundled Bo up and put him in his sled. We all walked to the park so Caleb could use his sled. Boaz fell asleep on the way and slept all the way there and once home. We were all freezing and had red faces, Boaz was completely warm and looked untouched by the cold, but we did have him bundled up a lot!
Boaz looking cute as always, 2.25.05
No Pain No Gain
Well everytime I complain I try to tell myself that, but today might just be too much. So I’ve worked out everyday this week. My legs are achy and now my lower back hurts so much I can barely walk. I’ve gotten like this before, the back hurting so bad I can barely walk or stand up straight and those times werent after working out, sometimes I’d just all of the sudden have the pain. So its not that new to me, but its been awhile since it’s happened and today is by far the worst! Dean keeps telling me I need to work through the pain and that that means my body is being stretched, it cant be good though to be in so much pain you cant stand up straight. How am I supposed to work out today when I can barely lift the baby?!?!? I dont want to give up but I dont see how I am supposed to work through the pain.
It’s snowing, they are predicting 4-8 inches of snow. Schools were cancelled in most places before the first snowflake fell from the sky. I thought we were set for groceries but last night before bed Dean had cereal w/ milk and left the milk sitting out on the counter all night. Now we have no milk. I was going to go to the store but with my back aching and the snow now building we’ll have to live. caleb said “we dont need milk mom, we have juice.” Smart boy I tell ya, guess we just wont cook anything requiring milk! The boy is playing wiht a bucket of snow I brought in from outside, he loves doing that. he decided he wanted to paint the snow. He’s entertaining himself so it’s all good. Now if I could find a way to hold Boaz without wincing in pain…..
Boaz on 2/18/05
We took Boaz swimming for the first time on 2/19 at the Y. I think caleb was just as excited as Dean & I were to be taking Boaz swimming.
I didnt have a swim suit big enough (or rather small enough) for Boaz. So I put him in this cute outfit that Aunt Rachel had given Caleb as a baby. He looked cute laying in the matching blanket waiting to go in the pool.
Caleb looking like such a big boy on his field trip to the science center
Dean & I have been together for quite a few years now, and I love him more than ever. It’s moments like ones in this pic that make me love him even more. He continues to steal my heart day after day. Thanks for being a great hubby and daddy!
The last week of my pregnancy my blood sugar levels were doing great. I stopped taking insulin the day Boaz was born. That afternoon my blood sugar levels were fine. I started eating a regular non diabetic diet as soon as I was allowed to eat food. Since then I know I’ve indulged a lot in sweets and in my effort to get in shape I have now decided to cut out the junk. Yesterday was day 1 without any sweets. I grabbed an apple w/ peanut butter yesterday instead of the chocolate I really wanted.
At my 6 week post op appt the dr gave me the order to get my 2 hour glucose test done again, I have yet to do it, mostly due to the time factor. I’d have to fast so I’d want to do the test in the morning but need a sitter so I can go. I’m planning on going next thursday while Caleb and Dean are at preschool. The biggest reason behind my going at all right now, since i thought I was doing ok was because I have been doing some monitoring and lately my fasting sugars have been high. They are running what they were when I was pregnant, with meds even. So I’m getting worried. This shows I might just have pre-diabetes. I’m praying its just that and not full blown diabetes yet. You can prevent or ward off diabetes w/ weight loss and exercise, at least I’m starting that before getting a diagnosis that will force me to. I’d love to get my test done sooner but then again I’d love to wait and lose some weight first to see if that helps my levels. I’m really worried but I know that changing my diet and exercise may be enough to help, please pray it is. I wish I couldnt test at home so I wouldnt be so concerned but then again it’s probably better to be aware of the disease then not. I was up a lot last night thinking about things and I ended up having crazy dreams. So this morning I was extremely exhausted. I’m suprised I’m not achy from the work out last night, but that’s good. If I was achy I’d be less enthusiastic to go back! 
