Sometimes saying no is the healthiest thing to do

I admit I’m a people-pleaser. I want to help others and always do what I can for them. This may sound noble, but sometimes it’s one of my biggest weaknesses.  In anticipation for this month of grueling classwork due to doubling up college courses I started setting boundaries.  What seems silly to some is necessary for my mental sanity.  I warned the leaders at church that I would not be serving all month in March.  Why can’t I give a couple of hours of my Sunday you ask? Well I probably can, but if I do that then I can’t use those hours for homework, or my family or catching up on much needed sleep after working late nights doing homework.  It’s more about lessening stress than anything else.  The less obligations I have the lower my stress level. Less stress = healthier me!

This week there have been many interruptions in my well-planned schedule.  I have a limited amount of hours to use to do homework without dealing with family obligations.  In order to maximize that time I need to say no to others, a lot.  I have had to ignore FB messages and stop checking emails. I’ve even resorted to leaving my phone in the van so I can’t hear when a new message, text, or email arrives.

Stress is evil. For me it manifests itself in hives and I often get sick because my immune system goes crazy when I’m stressed out. It’s a built in indicator of when I’m getting in too deep.  So this week as challenges have arisen please don’t get offended if I didn’t respond to your messages or if I flat out reject your request for help. I feel horrible saying no but I know that I’m already sick this week from the stress.

While I typically spend countless hours a day helping others, I know right now I have other priorities. So when I say no or tell you I will need more time to work on something please be patient. I’m doing it for my health and sanity.  It’s going to be a rough few weeks and while I hate secluding myself from community during times of chaos, I know for me it’s needed.  It’s a short season of time and it’s a very important time for me. Once I finish these two classes I’ll be just one course away from my diploma. I want to finish strong and do the best I can to stay on track. In addition to nearing the end of college I’m also nearing a huge success on my weight loss journey.  So right now my priorities are my family, my health, and my schoolwork.

Forgive me for setting boundaries, but don’t take it personally and please know I hate doing it.  So bear with me for a few weeks then I’ll be back to doing all I can to meet your needs!  It’s unbelievably hard for me to say no when someone needs my help.  So this is me, apologizing in advance for being a jerk for the next few weeks.