Today I went to the moms group at church. The kids played and had fun, someone actually got Zeke to fall asleep in their arms and he was sleeping when I picked him up.  the group meets from 10 am -12 pm. every other week, childcare is available at $5 per family. (pretty good, 2 kid free hours x 2 kids). I got home from group, pulled into my snow covered driveway, then into my 2 car garage. Unloaded myself and our junk into the house before going back out to get the kids.  As I walked into the house I felt such a peace wash over me.  This is our home.  A home so perfect in so many ways. The morning was so perfect, despite a lot of not so great things for me physically.
as of tomorrow evening we will no longer own our home in Baltimore, someone else will.  I kind of wish we had planned to go there to see the house one last time, it’s now been completely repainted head to toe so to speak.  friends helped us by emptying the rest of the stuff out this week.  They took some pics but we havent seen them yet.
Yesterday Dean spent his work yearly bonus on a big screen tv, 42 ” of pure joy for he and the boys when playing games, watching tv, what have you.  I could care less really.  I am anxious to have the house sold tomorrow. The van keeps driving oddly, we are counting down the days til we have the money from tomorrow to put down on a new van.
so much going on…I really needed to write last week, a few days ago…so much to say…little quiet time w/ me and a puter to do so.  I am just taking a quick minute to now since I felt the need to get these feelings down before I lose them, as I will. My mind is a mess these days.  I swear I dont know which of my kids is which, I get their names wrong frequently. this past Sunday while grocery shopping I had a list, would look at it walk a few steps and forget waht I was looking for.  I am having serious issues healthwise, dont want to think about it really. trying to keep busy so I dont have to.  but every flight of step is pure pain for me. I can barely get up and down the steps without falling if I am holding Zeke.  it’s great really….
things are good, things are bad….but one thing is for sure…life is good.  God is good.  and with each challenge a new strength is gained. I realized that this morning at group. I’ve learned alot having been through so much w/ my health. A lot I dont even realize until someone says something that makes it all so clear.   and today was one of those days.  I am an emotional mess this week too, darn hormones and illness will do that to you.
tomorrow ends that chapter of our lives. the final closure to the move I suppose.  yet when I talk to my friends on the phone, it’s like I just saw them yesterday. I miss you all and know we’ll be back to visit soon!!!
sorry for the random back and forth of topics…but that’s how my brain works these days.
back to the hustle and bustle of being a stay at home mom…a job I struggle with but really do love.
