Wisdom from my walk

bo flooded the kitchen today while I was upstairs changing to get ready for a field trip w/ his early intervention class.  I came downstairs to hear him hitting the panic button making the van alarm go off and saw the sink was overflowing and the bottom cabinets were filled w/ water and the floor was wet all the way to the bathroom.   I was in tears, late for their trip and Bo wouldnt listen.   I think my tears got to him and he finally went to time out in his room, Dean came home to help me clean up and Dean’s mom came to pick up Bo and Caleb to take them to the park where we are supposed to be going.  Now it’s raining.  I feel so defeated by Bo.  I dont know how to handle him anymore.  Spankings do no good, he hits us and bites us.  Time outs are ineffective.   Short of admitting myself for becoming insane I dont know what to do, and then it just leaves Bo in someone elses care.  I dont know what to do.  I am tired and lost.   I need to go wake up Zeke and head to the park in the rain.  and to think the day started off well…I actually made it to the Y this morning.   so Bo did fine there, of course.  He’s just a hellion for me and Dean.    God help us all, this child is going to do me in!  I just want to crawl back in bed and dream it all away.

the weekend was ok, yesterday the kids drove us nuts.   I was dreading today even because of how bad they(bo and Caleb) were acting.   Bo is hitting and biting, and not listening at all.  I dont know how to deal w/ him.   none of the pools we have memberships to open til 12.  I’d go to the Kings island water park since it opened at 10 but my neice is here and she doesnt have a pass.  I didnt go to my workout class since she was here as well.   so I’m dragging and I think I might have pink eye.  I just put Zeke down for a nap, plan is to have lunch when he gets up then head to the pool for a few hours.   until then I think bo is going to drive me crazy…speaking of him…gotta go

well Zeke was the only one who napped, which is ok I suppose.   We left for Kings Island after he got up.   Dean picked up a pizza and met us there.   Then we met his mom so she could take Zeke with them while we played longer at Kings Island.  shortly before 9 I realized I couldnt keep going, I was way too tired. After spending 15 minutes looking in the parking lot for the van(we drove both our cars)  even after hitting the panic button while walking up and down the rows I knew I was stuck.  I was achy, tired and down right miserable.  Dean came out and found it for me and Bo and I came home.   He’s in bed and I’m waiting for Dean and Caleb to get back, and at some point I am guessing the in laws will bring Zeke home too.  they were still out this evening too….hopefully we’ll all get to sleep in a bit tomorrow since it’s been a late evening for everyone.  I know I am ready for bed, I was ready to stay in bed this morning and by afternoon was praying for a nap so now I’m even more miserable.  I didnt have my glasses on the way home tonight, so I was driving in the dark w/ no glasses since I wore my RX sunglasses out earlier and didnt think ahead.  it was a fun ride home, fighting fatigue and not being able to see clearly.   I’ll never do either again…I need to stop pushing myself again, I just want to be able to do fun things and still do the necessary things that need done. but my body keeps reminding me I cant.   well I need to check laundry and head to bed.   have a great weekend, I plan to!

Spent two hours at the ENT this morning.  Zeke finished his antibiotic on Tuesday but still has fluid in both of his ears.   they did a hearing test and then scheduled him to get tubes put in both ears on the morning of July 2nd.   We then rushed to get to Caleb drs appt, he has a very bad ear infection as well as fluid in his other ear.  he goes for follow up in a few weeks and if it’s still a problem will go to the ENT.  Bo had fluid in his ears but no infection yet, he goes the same place Zeke did today next Friday.   my poor boys and their ears.  I am exhausted !!!  oh yeah…we met Dean for lunch then dropped off Caleb’s prescription, we’re home now for the boys to nap, and me too hopefully!  gotta go…Bo isnt like the idea of a nap!  but I so need one!

wohoo for working a/c!!   we sold our old van today!   It was payday!

today is Zeke’s ent appt.   I’m a little worried about it, but I know it’s not really a big deal, I just wish my little boys didnt have to deal with this.

first day of no school for Caleb.   I think we might go to the waterpark at kings island for a bit, esp. if it’s going to be hot.

faith is a funny thing, sometimes anyway.   yesterday I didnt really freak out about the money but I felt completely guilty that all of the extra money from the sale of the house was gone.  I know I sometimes overspend, heck I’m wearing a new shirt, I bought 4 shirts for myself this week, why? because I went shopping for a bathing suit, the stores I went to didnt have one but I found 4 shirts that were great and clearanced, I only spent $20 but I know it adds up. i know we eat out way too often, but by the end of the day I’m so wiped out I barely feel like eating let alone fixing something for everyone else to eat.  anyway….so I wasnt worried about not having money, i just hated having to use up our savings since it was the first time in the 9 years of our marriage that we had a significant, ok, ANY money in savings.  we got deans car fixed and today the a/c guy is coming.  Like clockwork, Dean got a call about the for sale ad for our old van (we’d been letting my BIL use it so we just listed it for sale this week) and the folks came a little bit ago.  they  are coming back later today to test drive it but said they will more than likely buy it as long as the ride is nice, which I have no doubt it will be.   so that’s a substantial chunk of change, not to mention this morning Dean’s paycheck went into the acct automatically.  just when we think things might get rough, things just fall into place.   this is how our life is, I have gotten much better at not sweating things, still not as carefree as Dean, but still, a lot better.

the irony is I totally freaked out today because of a sign at the Y.  I thought it said that the childcare hours were changing for the summer.   it said it would open at 9, but my exercise class starts at 8;30 M-F starting Monday.  i totally freaked, thinking I wouldnt be able to go to class anymore, a class that’s really helping me feel better, tired, but not nearly as achy and in pain.   I gave in and called the Y and sure enough I’d read the sign wrong, and there will be childcare at 8:30.  I am so looking forward to going early every morning M-F to start my day out healthy and also get a break from all three kiddos.  Today is caleb’s last day of school  he gets out in about an hour.  I am anxious about the summer of being home w/ all three alone, but I have faith that just like every day lately, I’ve managed and am managing fairly well.   the house isnt always spotless anymore, but the kids have fun, and so do I.  And at the end of the summer I’m sure I’ll be ready for school to start but I’m really excited about getting to see my eldest son more.  I really do feel bad that he’s not around as much as the little ones.  I’m hoping he feels the same way about being w/ us all day…but I think he’ll be more excited that he gets to play with his friends almost all day!

well off to figure out what’s for lunch.  praying this deal about the van goes well but most of all that the a/c gets fixed today!! it’s SOOOO hot!!

if we were still in Baltimore we’d have to deal w/ this, that is the school Caleb went to….guess I’d rather be upset about no kindergarten ceremony or anything than dealing w/ chiggers!!  😉