Wisdom from my walk

I am in so much pain….having stomach pains and in my back too…not sure if it’s related to my stomach yuckiness or not, but it REALLY hurts.  so much so I actually called to ask my MIL come help w/ the kids, she’s working til  8 but said she can be here right after that to get the kids bathed and in bed….sounds like a plan to me!!  now I just have to make it the next 5 hours….dean’s changed his flight home til Friday evening, he arrives at 6:45 p.m.  just one more day I suppose..it wouldnt bother me if I didnt feel so crappy.  At least I feel like I’m getting adult conversation thanks to the moms group and getting to know some neighbors more.   I just hate not getting time to rest when I need to , like now when I feel crappy.   No sick days for moms, it really sucks.  and it also wouldnt make me so frustrated if Dean wasnt going to lunch w/ other women..but that’s just something I’ll have to deal w/ it I suppose.   BLAH!! I’m in a bad mood if you cant tell!  well ok not really that bad a mood, just getting sick of being sick and tired, and not having Dean around makes me grouchy too!!  🙂

I actually got a good amount of sleep, 8 1/2 hours for once.  Woke up feeling better than most morning but after a shower, getting Caleb ready and off, putting in a load of laundry and getting the youngins dressed I feel wiped out again.  Doesnt help that my stomach is still “off”  I feel like I need a nap….and I know that is not going to happen.  Preschool is from 9-11:30 , need to feed the kids lunch after that, zeke has a 1:00 pm Dr’s appointment to check on how his new meds are working. and that shortly after we’re done their it will be time to go to the school to pick up Caleb and our neighbors son.   I hate starting out my day feeling this tired…

for the first night in a week, I might get to bed before midnight! wohoo!!  I’m EXHAUSTED!  Dean’s still not sure if he’s coming home Thurs. or Friday.   guessing if they dont get a flight change soon it might not even happen til the weekend.   My brother in law and our neighbor fixed the sink problem, apparently it seemed it was lacking in plumbers tape so it probably would have happened sooner or later, but what a better time than now right?  Dinner w/ our neighbors went well.  We always have lots to talk about and the kids get along superbly.(they have a one year old and a year year old- Bo loves them both!!  Zeke isnt emotionally attached to anyone, kidwise, now he LOVES his mom and his dad and I think his favorite other person is Granddad.(dean’s dad-ironically the only real granddad that will ever be in his life)

well I’m so tired my eyes hurt…so I am thinking I might just give in and go to bed early since it’s been a rough week and tomorrows going to be busy w/ preschool and Zeke’s afternoon doctors appointment.

many thanks go out to my brother in law and neighbor Jay for fixing my sink, it made cleaning up dinner a LOT easier with a working sink!!! 🙂

A no throw up day!! wohooo…and I was thinking the day was going so well…when after putting together a beef stew in the slow cooker for tomorrows meal and cleaning up the mess from that, I realized the kitchen sink wasnt draining, or rather it was leaking underneath and there was still water in the sink.  blah.   Some times you do need a man around the house…or at least a woman who knows plumbing.  I got the pipes apart and sprayed them out w/ the hose to make sure nothing was blocking them and thought the problem was fixed, if anything I’d gotten the sink drained that way.    So now the sink is drained but I’m not going to use the disposal and I”m going to keep a big bowl under the sink in case it leaks until someone, probably a man, takes a real look at the pipes.  I was just happy I at least got the sink drained, and if anything dinner will be ready for tomorrow!

our neighbor’s husband started coaching tennis for the first time this year, and his wife, who I’m slowly becoming friends with, is having a hard time adjusting to him being home so late, since he’s a teacher he used to get home pretty early, and this comes right after him being home all day in the summer.  I cant imagine how hard that adjustment much be, but then again if I had even a week w/ my hubby home all day I think the adjustment would be worth it!  but anyway, I suggested last week that we swap picking up and taking the kids to school, so she takes her son and Caleb to school in the morning(she just has two kids, a 1 year old a 6 year old) and I pick her son and Caleb up in the afternoon.  I also said that since dinner time is hard for her now, and she’s just cooking for the kids and herself, as am I this week, that I make a big meal for our families to share one night her hubby would be back late from tennis matches.  So tomorrow night we’ll be sharing beef stew, a la crock pot of course.  but I’ll make some bisquick biscuits too before they come so it wont all the prep wont be done tonight.  she’s going to prepare a meal for us on Thursday.  Dean was supposed to be flying home on Thursday evening so I was going to see if we could eat earlier w/ them, but today Dean’s work told him he wont be able to leave til after work on Friday.   So not sure when he’ll get in, but at least I wont be cooking on Thursday!  🙂

so despite a long sick night for myself, and a groggy morning, the day ended mostly okay, as far as the kids go.  we had dinner on the deck out back, and caleb’s friend Ally joined us.  afterward we sat on the front porch eating ice cream(I was trying to avoid cleaning the kitchen up again from a meal!)

Tomorrow morning we have preschool and the afternoon is free and we’ll have friends over for dinner.  so lots to look forward to.

It’s been one of those weekends.  I’m at that point w/ things that happen that I just laugh it off.  Like it could really get any worse.  I was supposed to be at church last night by 6 for our meeting and then to work on the tech team for the service that started at 6:30p.m.  All the way to church Boaz screamed and yelled and threw  a cup at my head.   and it ended in him making himself throw up as I pulled into a parking spot at church.  there was throw up everywhere and it was already 6:05.  I didnt know what to do, so called Dean to call the tech team and tell them I was hoping to come but that didnt know how long I’d be.  I cleaned up bo, luckily had a set of spare clothes, and left the throw up that was on the car seat and the floor there to deal w/ after church.   i went to our friend who runs the nursery kind of, it’s easiest to explain that way,. and told her what was going on. She is AWESOME!!  she got Bo to calm down and I ran back to the van to get the cell phone I’d forgotten, in case he got more upset and they needed to call me, then tried to run to the media booth.. on the way there someone yelled my name, I yelled back and asked where to find him later and kept running.  Ran into old friends (dean’s old co-worker) and w/ panting breath explained I was late, Dean was out of town and that I had to go.   I finally made it there shortly before 6:30. I never truly recovered from being rushed and my performance was off al night.

After that we were to meet up w/ Dean’s parents so Bo could go spend the night w/ Caleb there.  I got on the highway, which was completely stopped traffic.   called to tell them I was going to be late, and settled on driving him the other 20 minutes to their house since they had our neice who had just thrown up and needed to get her home.   We finally made it there, after stopping to get the kids dinner at mcdonalds (at 9 at night!) ate, then Zeke and I came home.  I couldnt crash til after 11 by the time I stopped to get gas, clean up the rest of the throw up and get things set out for today.   I was then up most of the night w/ this dumb stomach crap, luckily for me it’s not throw up.  thinking it may just be my IBS acting up, no doubt a result of stress.

this morning Zeke and I got up and out fine and he did great all morning, as did I must say.   I love working on tech team, it really satisfies the need I have to do something I enjoy and to do something purposeful as well.  i would love to work on the team every week, but the kids cant stand how much we work now.   I was so glad to have the break from the kids but was busy working the whole time.   I was exhausted and near falling asleep driving to Dean’s parents again too, for lunch and to get the kids. we stayed there til almost 5, then went to stock up on groceries for the week and come home and eat dinner.   Zeke threw up, again.  I’m so afraid he’s going to have the same problem Bo has, whatever it is that makes them gag and throw up so often.   this is about the age it started w/ bo if i remember correctly.   and zeke cant afford to not eat or lose weight, he’s so tiny already.

Caleb and Zeke are asleep but Bo is up.  he had a nose bleed and I’ve been in the bathroom since because of my stomach and he’s taken advantage of that and making a mess.

like I said, things just cant get worse, I mean I KNOW they can.  and I am SURE they probably will before Dean comes back on Thursday, that’s just how my life is.  but it’s just so ironic now that all I can do is say “oh well” and get over it.   I hate being at that point w/ my life, to the point of being so frustrated and dissappointed at how bad things keep happening that I just find it funny, but I’d rather be laughing then spending what little energy I have left crying.

I think after been through a few weeks w/ Dean gone due to the move and for Katrina relief, I’ve come to grips that I just have to deal w/ things and not stress, theres just not enough time or energy to worry about things I cant control.  but I sure as heck wish I could figure out how to keep my kids from throwing up…and my stomach from being a mess.

I’m really in a good place mentally even though life is crazy, it’s just life.  and last night I told the tech team w/ panting breath as I finally made it to my station, that” life just happens when your husband’s out of town for a week” and that’s the point, life goes on and I have to do what I have to do, even if I cant stand cleaning up throw up , I cant leave it for Dean to clean up next week….it’s my job and I better get used to it!  🙂

it’s 65 degrees outside!!  no clouds in the sky and a cool breeze is blowing.   Bo, Zeke and I went to Dean’s work employee and family picnic.  it took us an hour to get, luckily got better directions and go home faster than that.  I only knew one person and Dean told him we were on our way.    there were inflatable bouncy things, including an obstacle course.  Crafts for the kids, Bo enjoyed painting a wooden fish, he calls it his goldfish.   Caleb would have had a blast, wishing I had taken him, but he is spending the weekend w/ Dean’s parents.  Bo and Zeke got little bengal balls, and Bo got a bag of candy.   we had lunch there, yay for free food that I dont have make or clean up!!  (thinking about eating out at our favorite place that has free kids meals on Saturdays for dinner!)   so it was fun, but made me really miss Dean, he would have had a lot of fun. but he’s in Maryland, attending his cousins wedding at the Ren. Fest.   Zeke’s napping then we’ll have dinner and head to church.   then after we’re going to take Bo to Dean’s parents to spend the night, w/ caleb too.  So that tomorrow morning I’ll just have Zeke to take to church while i work all morning.   I’m looking forward to the break tonight and tomorrow!

I’m loving this weather,, but I think I’m going to have to take Caleb shopping tomorrow for pants, I dont think any of his are going to fit him.  I’m actually chilly siting here in our living room w/ a fan on blowing the cool air inside.   well…gotta do some laundry and figure out dinner.  (not sure I want to fight w/ the kids at a restaurant, but also not in the mood to cook or clean up!:-) )

email and internet are up, but it appears they lost everything from the 9th-today.  I’m hoping they can retrieve it…I’m really gonna be pissed…..