Wisdom from my walk

while I am not at all happy w/ my diet right now, there is one major plus to eating this way: energy. I have so much more energy in the last two weeks. A few weeks ago I went to the ob complaining of extreme fatigue, to the point of not being able to get out of bed, today I not only got out of bed, took the kid to his first day solo at preschool but ran countless errands, including grocery shopping, came home fed the kid lunch, went for a walk to the park w/ Caleb, then put him down for nap while I mowed the grass. I tried to nap after all that but I just couldnt sleep so I took a shower to ease my aching feet! Dinner is well on it’s way to being done and the house is clean. I love days like these! the true test will be how I feel tomorrow!

And that being said about diet, it’s not that I cant hack the not eating sugar or sweets that I was craving before, because I’ve had barely any cravings this last week. Sure I’d love something naughty but the amount of fruit I’m eating now fills my sweet need more than any chocolate could. For me the hardest part of my 1800 calorie diet is eating that much food. I’m not a breakfast eater and while I may be overweight my problem is not usually overeating at meals, it’s more lack of exercise, heck in the last year I’ve maintained the same weight, not gained or lost, which for me was a good thing. I had figured out how to eat to maintain the 25 lbs I lost doing atkins. So coming into this pregnancy I knew what dieting was, but for me this is more torture than atkins. I’d rather cut carbs completely then be forced to eat these huge amounts of food at meals. For lunch and dinner I have to eat 2 starches, a serving of fruit, 2 servings of veggies, 3 servings of meat and 2 servings of fat. Thats a lot of freaking food. yes, the serving sizes are not huge, but adding fruit and that amount of starches to my diet is difficult since I was cutting carbs, aka starches before and fruit becuase I learned w/ Caleb that fruit makes my blood sugar go nuts. but if I follow this meal plan I have to eat it. I’m supposed to talk to the dietician tomorrow and am dreading it. I know it’s healthy to eat fruits and veggies w/ meals but I usually plan to eat one or the other at a meal, before this diet that is. it’s not that I dont like veggies or fruit, I actually love having to eat them it’s just hard to do it all at one meal. My belly is not used to eating so much at one meal. it’s getting annoying forcing myself to eat when I am not hungry at all, meantime when I am starving at 11 am or 11 pm I cant eat anything because those times arent in my meal plan. I literally have to eat w/in certain time frames, quite annoying and inconvenient. So the cutting sweets of this diet isnt killing me, it’s the eating! who would have thought! but the more days I do this the more I remember this by the exact reason I couldnt hack the diet the first pregnancy and thus needed meds to regulate my sugar. Sure I feel better on this diet overall but my poor stomach is constantly complaining about the situation, it’s either achy and way too full or achy and starving.

well that was somewhat not pregnancy related, if I wasnt pregnant I wouldnt have this diet right now! As I quickly mentioned above, Caleb went to preschool this morning on his own. The first few times I was a parent volunteer in class so he was with me off and on. Today I dropped him off and got a chance to go shopping and run errands alone, other than w/ Baby B in my belly of course. I’m going to take advantage of the next 9 weeks of shopping during this time because it’s soooo nice! Once the baby comes it will be a little more difficult since I’ll have to take the baby shopping w/ me and for the life of me I dont remember how I did grocery shopping w/ Caleb as an infant, I am guessing I did it though because I know we ate and that I cooked! Funny the things we forget as parents. I’m hoping I never forget today, taking my little boy to school and seeing the joy in his face and in his voice when I arrived to pick him up. He loves school and does great there. He has a little boy he’s taken on as a friend, and to hear him say his name is so sweet, William. Too cute. There’s also only 2 girls in the class and one Caleb is quite taken w/ but she’s always trying to play with the other boys, my poor boy is already dealing w/ rejection. and it’s not due to lack of looks, our boy is a looker and a sweetheart! He’s very good with the other kids and they all seem to get along just fine so far. It’s a huge relief to know your son is social and independent. There are some things you can teach a child and other things I think are just a part of their personality, wherever it comes from, I’m grateful our son is how he is. He may get grouchy a lot, no doubt a trait adopted from me or well maybe even his dad, but it’s not nearly as bad as things could be for behavior problems in a 3 year old. The other day Caleb was doing something sweet and adorable and I commented to Dean that the great part is we get to do this all over again w/ Baby B. Yes nothing will be as wonderful as your firstborns accomplishments or cute sayings or silly song singing, but to know we will have the joy of raising another wonderful little boy is an amazing thing. God has blessed us in so many ways, and yes while it might be nice to have a little girl, I’m almost relieved to have a boy again because I already know how to handle them and well being a girl and all I know we are much more complicated creatures! So today was memorable for many reasons and I only hope my preggo brain can retain all the wonderfulness of it!

A wise man once said everyone has a story to tell. lately when I write all I can write about is this pregnancy or other pregnancy related issues. This is good for those readers who are also preggo but other than that I apologize for boring you or giving you too much info on pregnancy that you never needed to hear about! I’ll try to post more about different things but when all that consumes my time is pregnancy or preschool matters it gets hard.

Dean bought a new toy this week with some cash from a computer side job he had, money I would have found a lot to do with, but seeing as he earned it and never gets anything for himself, I couldn’t say much. I’ve at least been able to halt the rest of the funds while we decide if he can get direct tv w/ tivo. I’d love tivo, especially since w/ the baby I might miss some shows in a month or two, but it’s not as necessary as say….diapers or formula will be when I’m missing those shows! While I can moan and groan about him having spent that much money on something so unneccessary, I’ve had fun enjoying his new toy. We now listen to praise and worship or other contemporary Christian music at night, and it really puts me much more at peace at bedtime. the difference in how I’m sleeping is amazing actually. it’s either that added calm atmosphere or complete exhaustion letting me sleep through the night til 5 or 6 am w/out having to get up to empty my bladder- or a combination of the two!

I have made a list of projects I want done before Baby B arrives, and the list is mostly stuff that Dean could care less about, but the result so far has been wonderful. What was a bland looking extra living area and laundry area is now a very inviting comfortable space. I’ve still got some work to do to complete the makeover and am still kicking myself for not taking before pics but what can one do, a pregnant mind can only focus on one task at hand, or rather ten different non-essential tasks! I’ve spent the weekend and beginning of the week trying to complete the organization of our basement and have accomplished a great deal. now if I could just motivate Dean into helping w/ the other things on my list!

I really think men get the best deal out of pregnancy. Not only do they not endure any of the physical ailments, my biggest complaint right now is how Dean can down brownies, chips and dip, candy and whatever else he desires while my current diet is very strict and I am afraid to even get close to those foods because I have no self control! It’s not a fair deal at all. But aside from that he also gets to escape this nagging desire to nest, like I said he could care less about the projects I feel need done asap, and indeed his comment is always, we’ve got plenty of time. Yeah time, there’s never enough time for anything and w/ the way we get projects done together it has been easier to just tackle these big things alone and get them done quicker than trying to rope Dean into the work too! But I wont complain too much because while I may not be able to eat whatever I want and do whatever I want when I want, I can still feel these little kicks and jabs from baby B. The other night while letting Dean feel the baby kick and move, he commented that he wished he could feel it like I do. I would love for him to be able to experience it but then again it’s also my favorite thing about being pregnant, so I’d also hate to give that experience away. I”m more than happy to share w/ him so that he can place his hand on my belly and feel the baby move, but I will miss the days when I can feel Baby B inside me. I will not miss the diet adn all the other things that are so tough about this pregnancy, but there are definitely things to enjoy and I have to keep reminding myself of these things as I complain about all of the other pregnancy issues. Well there I go again talking about pregnancy, I just cant help myself! so this is week 29 and we are down to 9 weeks to delivery since my c-section is at 38 weeks!! Next week marks the beginning of October and that scares me very much, before we know it it’ll be November and then time for baby!!! I look forward to it, and am getting sick of the rough parts of this pregnancy but then again I feel so unprepared for this child! Guess that will never go away!

let me go try to think of some non pregnancy stuff I can write about later!

My first pregnancy was very complicated. So far this one has been much better, until this last week or so. Today things seem to be turning into a whirlwind of baby worries and fears as we had a frightening scare this weekend when I had some spotting but the dr seems to think things are fine. So today I got a message to call the ob’s office, assuming it was a follow up call from when I called the dr on call on Saturday night, but no this was about other ob stuff. My lab work I had done last week came back that I have an infection and need more testing done, but the nurse didnt explain it very well. I’ve had several infections throughout the pregnancy and the last time it didnt respond to antibiotic treatment, so they are doing another test to see what type of antibiotic to give me, I think thats what they are going to do anyway. Meanwhile the endocronoligist calls to schedule my appt and asks me questions about my thyroid tests, which to my knowledge I never had done or at least never was told were done, she set up me for an appt next week, the day before my next ob appointment. Assuming before now and then these contractions, cramps and pressure I’ve been having dont get worse and I need to go before then.

I’ve been in full nesting mode this weekend and today Dean asked if its going to be like this for the next 9 weeks, for his sake and mine I hope not. But I spent Saturday painting, which is probably what caused my cramps and spotting on Saturday night. So on Sunday my hubby who was intent on not helping paint finished my paint job for me so I wouldnt overdo it again. But even at church yesterday I was having cramps and a lot of pressure so I”m just praying this infection and the other problems aren’t going to cause Baby B to arrive early. I never had any preterm labor fears w/ Caleb and didnt even know what a contraction felt like until labor with him so needless to say these contractions and cramps are a little scary for me. At least with every passing week the baby has better chances if delivered early, but I pray it doesnt come to that. So today I’m trying to take it easy, as much as I can but Caleb is being quite fiesty and if I dont get out of the house with him soon I might lose my mind! Just wanted to update some. So things around here are getting super busy w/ preschool plans and now a zillion drs appointments and lab work. So I get to spend my first morning free while Caleb goes to preschool on Thursday at the ob office getting more tests done, not exactly how I wanted my first free morning to go, but at least I’ll be able to go w/out finding a sitter or having the kid tag along. I knew the last trimester would get crazy, and expected as much since my first pregnancy was bad the last trimester, but I had some hope since I was feeling really good last week, but things can change so maybe after we get more blood work and all the other testing done things will calm down and we’ll get the answers we need.

The scary facts about diabetes they dont tell you when you are pregnant, or ever!!

“Women diagnosed with gestational diabetes have an increased risk of developing diabetes mellitus in the future. If they require insulin for their pregnancy, there is a 50% risk of diabetes within 5 years. If dietary control has been sufficient, a 60% risk of developing diabetes mellitus within 10-15 years still persists.”

This isnt the first time I’ve stumbled upon this fact and the scary thing is since I needed to be on meds to control blood sugar w/ Caleb then I am w/in that higher risk category. Does this mean when Caleb turns 5 or around then I could be developing this, or worse yet that after I deliver this child that the diabetes won’t go away!?? Scary thoughts for sure!! I’m dieting a lot this last week, still waiting for an appt with a dietician and needing it….I am afriad I’m dieting too well. I know you arent supposed to really diet in pregnancy but I’ve cut all sugar and a lot of carbs. I try to keep my carb intake very low too, I’m afraid I might be overdoing it. No way to know though until I get my actual meal plan from the nutritionist, and heck if it means no meds this pregnancy that is fine w/ me, as long as Baby B gets all he needs. He seems happy and healthy enough as he kicks me all day and night long!!

Tentatively scheduled: baby B’s birthday will be (drum roll please) November 24th! The scheduler wasnt paying much attention at first and said how about November 25th, thinking she was either joking or not realzing, I mentioned that that is Thanksgiving and she laughed and said oh well that wont work. The next option put me more at 39 weeks pregnant and they want to avoid going too late so the first day before that day of course is Thanksgiving Eve. The downside of this is that I will be in the hospital on Thanksgiving, but I guess it wont be too bad. At least everyone will have the day off of work the day after he’s born so I can expect a lot of visitors!! For those counting, Baby B will be born in 10 weeks from today!

I had my 28 week ob appointment today. I’ve gained 3 lbs in the last two weeks, less than I thought I had but still a pretty big gain for me. I finally got my glucose test results, and at first the dr said I passed, out of four blood draws only one was high then as she looked over the test results she said nope nevermind they just didnt highlight all the high results, so I failed, but not too miserably! So there is hope I may be able to control it this time w/ diet. I have another appt on Sept 30th at which time they’ll check my sugars and if I’m doing good on diet alone then we’ll just watch it, but if not I’ll go back on the meds I was on w/ caleb or something similiar. The way things are being done this time are so different from last time, they arent going to make me see a high risk dr like I did w/ Caleb, I would prefer that. Instead they send you to an endocronologist. Very different indeed than what i did the first pregnancy. I’m supposed to talk to the scheduling girl later today to schedule my c-section, wohoo! I’ll update with that info when I have it.

I spent a good portion of my morning trying to get my 28 week Rhogam injection, a whole different battle than last pregnancy too. Last time I went to the perinatologist I saw every week after 28 weeks and got weekly ultrasounds and the like and they did my Rhogam shot there. Today I had to actually go to the hospital mini surgery center and get the shot, which meant waiting forever! All for a quick injection. It was a long tiring day indeed.

well Caleb and I need a nap or at least a rest time, I’ll update when I have more info on scheduling our baby’s birthday!! I cant help but think that scheduling is kind of screwing w/ God’s plan for our child but what can you do? theres little to no chance of my being able to vaginally deliver so he let us get pregnant and I am guessing he already knows this little ones birthday, it’s just us that are waiting to find out!