It’s been a crazy weekend. Dean wrote about most of it in his blog. We really did get some cute pics of Caleb in a pumpkin patch. He is adorable. He’s so alert and smiles real smiles whenever Dean or I talk to him.
Dean’s parents will be visiting this weekend, I am looking forward to it. I am just afraid it will make Dean more depressed about them not being around. He’s doing well mostly but I know it bothers him. I remember how it was when I first moved to Ohio but I am sure it is different for him since not only does he miss them but he knows Caleb is missing out too.
Looks to be another dull week for me, no car still. Just more laundry , cleaning and baby tending . I compiled an updated resume on Saturday and sent it out in response to an ad with Johns Hopkins. I really miss working, but I am not looking forward to putting Caleb in day care. he is already showing signs of being a bright child and is so eager to learn and take things in that I am afraid being in a daycare setting he will lose that. I mean I know he wont get one on one attention as much as he should and who knows if they will even try to make sure he gets learning time each day by talking with him and introducing him to new things. Its a horrible dilemma, settle for living without extra cash or staying home with Caleb. We figured out that we will be able to afford to live on Deans check but I still would love to have my own money. Even if it is just being saved for a rainy day. I love my son and love being with him, but I need something to get me motivated outside of the house and I know it would be hard to leave him all day but I cant help but think it will be better for me to go back to work. I dont mind being home with him I just feel like I am missing out on things, I know that is selfish and I know that Caleb will miss out by not having me home, but will he really even care , I mean he’s only 2 months old! I dont know. Dean wont say much on the matter so I am not sure what he expects of me. i know some men want their wives home with the kids but with Dean I just dont know what he wants. I sure wish he’d tell me what to do that way I dont have to make up my mind all alone! (hint hint Dean!)
