Wisdom from my walk

Joined and worked out for my first time at Curves tonight w/ my friend(who is our neighbor as well.) I was amazed at how simple their program is and yet I was able to get a really good work out in, got my heart rate going and at the end was sweating! Aiming to go at least three times a week. (the biggest issue is they dont have childcare, but my friend and I are thinking we can swap kids and take turns going to work out during the day) They weighed me and took my measurements, but before that asked me how much I weighed. I told her what it was last time I was weighed, and I weighed about 10 lbs less than my last weigh in at the doctor, and to think I thought I was gaining weight!! yay me!! so I”m already doing better than I thought I was. Now I really just need to figure out how to control my late night snacking….Dean’s out this evening, so snacking would be so easy to do, but would seem dumb since I already worked out! To get to my goal weight I’d have to lose 70 lbs, maybe even 80 if I’m ambitious, and i know others have lost that much weight if not more….just praying I can stick w/ this workout plan and get my fibromyalgia in check. and of course loose some weight! I’d love to lose that much weight before my 30th birthday, 14 months away. guess it’s not completely unreasonably is it?

now my email is gone on the webmail version tooooooooo

so dont email please call if you need something!!

somehow my email got wiped from my laptop….I can still log into it via a webmail account but all of my emails are off of my laptops mail system!!!   Not sure how it happened but praying Dean can fix it later!!

new pics up on flickr…will try to get a few up here tomorrow w/ a post to go w/ it.   we had a fun day!! I also went and got a PRO flickr acct so everyone can see all my photos now, I had too many before w/out a pro acct.

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but we’ve taken Caleb on “servant evangelism” outreaches since he was little. As the family grew it got very hard to do outreach together in that way. caleb served w/ us this summer and loves doing so. Today our church had a huge serving event as part of a series we’re doing, but let me note these acts of service are done every saturday at our church, today was more focused on getting everyone involved not just those who always do. So we had planned to meet some of our small group at the event closest to our home, about a mile away, at most. the boys played on th playground for a bit and eventually Dean kept an eye on them while I helped prep flowers that were going to be given out a nursing home. Later we served at a intersection less than a mile from our house handing out free water with members from our small group and others from our church. Bo loved it and Zeke had fun until he realized he needed a nap, but even then seemed content and helped me hold up my “free water” sign. Caleb of course again loved it and Dean and I always do! afterward everyone met back up at the park for hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill. it was awesome to meet new people, serve w/ our current group members and do so all w/in close proximity to our home, something we’ve lacked in our lives for a long long time.

tonight we went to church and Dean was going to man a camera during the service but we didnt know til we got there which one. It ended up being one of the ones that requires him to sit in the front row of the huge auditorium. that meant I either sat w/out him elsewhere or sat up front. I have issues sitting that close, not to mention knowing everyone behind us and in the balcony can see me there(I know I have issues) and that was hard for me the first time I had to work that camera, but got wrapped into my work so didnt really care. but tonight it was awkward number one because I had to sit next to Dean and not interrupt him, and # two because I didnt have the camera work to focus on, and would have had time to stress about sitting so close…but the message was great and we had more worship than usual and that’s always good for me! but I think God may have planned for me to start working the camera and getting out of my comfort zone so that I can get over my issues w/ being up front. I know a lot of this comes from past issues I have of those who “sat up front” at church and why they did and how they acted when they did. I dont want to be “that” person. but I was glad to day to be sitting up there, next to my hubby doing an awesome job serving, and knowing that this church, no matter how big it is , is definitely our home and I’m so comfortable there it’s amazing, whether it’s in the front row or in the balcony(which we probably wont go back to now that I’m over my front row fear! )

If you can see a theme here in this weeks posts….it’s 8:30 and I’m out of bed, showered and dressed but I’d give anything to be back in bed!! why are things so much worse for me lately?   before going to the dr last week I had already been out of my meds for a week so I was feeling crappy, but instead of taking the prescription meds I was just taking regular ibuprofen.   and it seemed to make as little a dent as the prescription pain meds I was on did….so I figured I would just stick w/ non prescription.  but I also cut a few other of my meds…my migraine medicine, which was costly and flexeril,the muscle relaxer the dr prescribed to help me sleep, but it wasnt doing its job of helping me sleep anyway so it was pointless to waste the money as well.   so it’s been two weeks w/out 3 of my daily meds, some which I took twice daily.  the biggest complaint is I feel horrible in the mornings.  I mean this is generally normal but I could take my morning pills and get going and feel somewhat manageable in an hour or two.   but now I’m just constantly behind in energy and frequently in pain.    the drs prescription for all of this, I need to exercise.  needless to say she’s probably right but I think if she went through a day in my life she might realize I do a lot and I’m not a sedentary SAHM.   I think she thinks I just stay home w/ the kids and sit on my butt all day.  there was no way to argue w/ her, except we cant afford the meds what makes her think we can afford a gym membership, which we did tell her.  we agreed I’d start walking every day.   so in order to feel better I am suppose to work through my pain and fatigue and maybe one day it will help me feel better…anyone see the downside of this plan?? who’s going to help me take care of the kids when I feel so crappy because I’m not sleeping well, am in pain and am so tired all of the freaking time??  guess that’s not the doctors problem right?

I so need a nap….