Wisdom from my walk

well, we spent just about all weekend cooped up in the house.  today looks to be the same way.   Dean is staying home from work and Caleb from school.  We were going to try to send Caleb but he didnt want to go, claiming his head and throat hurt.  he’s got a horrible sounding cough, as do I again.  Everyone was asleep last night and right about 11 I started w/ the upset stomach that both Caleb and Dean have had for a day or two.  I was finally able to get some sleep and I’m hoping it doesnt keep me from going to my drs appt today.  if anything at least now I wont have to take any kids to the appt w/ me since Dean is home.   We were all driving one another nuts yesterday so I’m glad I at least have a reason to get out of the house even if just for a little bit today.   Ugh, my stomach is gurgling again.  I had to eat breakfast because even if I’m sick I need to eat to keep my sugar levels regulated.    It should be another lazy day around here, the weather is fitting, rainy and grey.   It’s one of those bah kind of days.    I’m letting Dean sleep in again, geez he’s lucky, 3 days of sleeping in, must be nice!   Hoping I get a nap this afternoon to make up for it!

the last two nights both kids have been up at usually right after we get back into bed after tending one the other is up for something.  Last night Caleb spent a good part of the night in the bathroom w/ an upset stomach.   Bo for once slept through til 5 at which point he didnt want to go back to bed.  we finally got him settled in after taking turns trying about 6:30 a.m.   In anticipation for another long night, already lacking sleep for days, and feeling atogether crappy myself, I went to be shortly before 9 pm.   Dean stayed home but I dont know til when.   i didnt really care I just wanted to catch up on some sleep.    This morning I’m trying to let him sleep in but it gets boring being w/ the kids alone and knowing he’s here to hang out with us.  He says his stomach hurts too so I’m dreading getting it myself.

Somehow I’m wondering if the fact I got a decent amt of sleep for once affected my sugar level since for the first time since staring to check it several times daily it was normal when I woke up.   that or the fact I didnt eat a snack before going to bed, although my meal plan includes 3 meals and 3 snacks including one before bed.   But that theory went out the window when I ate hardly anything for breakfast and my normal sugar level one hour later was once again high. heck, I just checked it again, thinking I had checked it ten minutes too early, and it’s even higher and I didnt eat or drink anything during that time! By the end of the day my levels normalize but from waking til sometime late in the day my sugar level always high.  I imagine I’ll be on insulin a lot sooner than I was with Bo’s pregnancy.

We’re not going to church today due to the looming illness amongst us. I’m bummed because I actually feel much better than I did yesterday just tired and in some pain off and on.   I’m trying to let Dean sleep but I get bored and frustrated having to deal with them alone on the weekends esp. knowing next weekend Dean’s spending all weekend working his second job.  the money will be good but the stress for me makes me wonder if it is really worth it.   I’m hoping to go w/ my mom to the shore to visit my brother on Saturday but not for sure yet.  We’ll see how we’re doing later this week.   When looking back at my blog for my pregnancy for Bo, I saw that I had preterm labor issues at 30 weeks, this pregnancy that has already happened so I’m dreading what will happen the further along I get.   Adding the high sugar levels doesnt help issues and I really am noticing a lot of swelling these last few days and I know thats not good either.   I always have at least once that they check for toxemia and that’s happened this pregnancy already and it’s so early.  I’m hoping that these fears are just that fears, nothing that will come true.  that things wont get worse than they have been but the way I’m feeling and knowing how the last two pregnancies went, I’m not so sure what to expect.

well Dean finally got up, suprised it took him so long, I cant get caleb to stop being loud and Bo keeps talking loudly too for some reason.   If it was me I’d be up, thus why I am, because I cant sleep through any noise, Dean on the other hand has slept through a tornado before so I know nothing keeps him from his sleep.    Pray we all get and stay healthy.  Hoping Caleb is well enough for school tomorrow, I have a drs appt and it’s bad enough I have to take Bo w/ me.   Hope everyone else had a good weekend!!f

This is me today, 28 wks 1 day w/ baby # 3.. I  hate how big I look compared to then.   my face is swollen like it was when I was pregnant w/ Caleb.   hoping thats not from the sugar/blood pressure issues.   been taking my sugars 4 times a day since Thursday and it’s been over what it should be almost every time despite  my eating according to the diet and drinking nothing but water.  maybe  its all the water making me swell up.    All I know is I’m not very happy with how I look.  I almost just deleted these pics but oh well  this is the real me no reason to hide , not like I could hide as big as I am!  Did I mention how depressing this is, well this and the diabetes?

Any ideas on drinks that dont have artificial sweetners( i.e. aspartame, splenda) yet dont have sugar either? I’ve been drinking water only for 2 days and it’s driving me nuts.   i cant have sugar now and was told months ago no artificial sweetners.  This sucks big time.  I dont mind water in general and will chose it over other things sometimes but being stuck with no choice is different than my choosing to drink water when I have options.   day one of this diet and it sucks and my sugars have been high already.   guess when you start out the day with high fasting sugars theres no way to make it get better.  tried cleaning and keeping busy since exercise lowers sugar levels but that made me contract and have cramps it’s a no win situation.  take it easy but keep your sugar levels down on your own.  if I didnt eat i probably could but then that’s not good either.   geez….I’m grouchcy today if you cant tell. no more like depressed.  I know 11 weeks of this wont be so bad but this is hard to adjust to again.   I just hope it goes away after delivery or else life will really suck.    the chances of developing diabetes w/in 5 years after having gest. diabetes is high, Caleb is 4 + years old.   the 5 year mark is coming up and since then I’ve had insulin dependent gest. diabetes raising the risk more.    Ugh the things to look forward to….thanks dad for the great genes.  did I mention the family history of diabetes?  bah….gonna go lay down since Bo is napping, the house is clean and waiting for the laundry to finish.

When getting called back by the nurse to get my vitals I made sure to ask her to double check if my lab results from Saturday were in my chart.  they werent so they put me in a room to wait for the dr and for the results.  Let me just say Bo did great the whole time, he loves being out where there are lots of people so it was good for him.  So I saw the dr and she went back out to check on the test results after checking my measurements and for the baby’s heart beat, a strong 150 as it always is.    She came back in with someone, I’m guessing at this point another nurse.   She gave me my rhogam shot and then said she’d give me a prescription for iron since I was anemic.  I was waiting not so patiently for the rest of the results, they had done a RH Screening, thus the need for the rhogam, and a CBC along w/ the glucose test.  So two out of three results went well dont you think? So then the clincher, you failed.  Normal values are under 130, mine was a whopping 183.  No need for the 3 hour w/ that score and my history with needing insulin.  and I was worrying about having to convince them not to do the three hour, they needed no convincing.  I now have an appt set for this upcoming Monday w/ my endocronologist about my thyroid and now my diabetes.    Until then I have to try to remember my diet from last time and start checking my sugar 4 times a day.   This past week I’m being eating chocolate like crazy, I’m sure in part because I knew the end was in sight, but as I think more about it I am so unprepared for this.  For having to alter my diet so drastically.  it’s gonna suck but the 3rd time around should be easier than the 1st two times right?

we are getting together with our life group tonight, always lots of good food there but looks like I’ll be analyzing what I’m eating too much to enjoy.  Luckily I am making a spinach lasagna so I know I can at least enjoy some of that.  it will probably fill my carb and sugar needs for dinner but oh well, I could always just start the diet after I see the endo but for the sake of the baby I will do my best.  that and to avoid insulin as long as possible.  well I need to feed Bo lunch and figure out something I can eat.   both should be fun…

A year ago, my life was so different.   I was adjusting to being a mom to two boys with one being a 2 month old.   We still had the dog, but she was about on her way out at that point.   Caleb seems so different when I look at pics, and though it’s just been a year I’d say he’s grown a lot in the last year and is such a different kid.  i think being in school all day has changed him alot as well.  he seems to be smarter with each passing minute.  Boaz of course went from a newborn to a walking talking cutie pie.    the biggest suprise to me in the last year is the fact that i’m just weeks away from being a mom to 3 boys.   11 weeks til I have another major life adjustment to make; til we all do.    I wouldnt have planned this pregnancy at this exact time but I know God has a plan for us and this baby and the more I think about it the more exciting it is.   I love that Boaz is growing up and isn’t  a ‘baby’ anymore, just in time for the new baby.   I mean he’s still a little thing but he’s so independent and it amazes me somedays that he’s as young as he is.   I’ve got my 28 week ob appt today, guessing I”ll get my labwork results today and am already dreading gettting on the scale!  Caleb is at school but I’ll be taking Bo w/ me to my appt.  I’ll update later about my appt.  Just wanted to reflect some more.  Pregnancy does that to me.

Just got these pics developed from our trip to Ohio for Thanksgiving.   We had forgotten our memory card for the digital camera so I bought two disposable cameras and just took them to get developed last week.   Since I also chose to get them put on CD so we’d have them to share online so here’s a few of my favorites.  I really love this one of Dean and I.   I was sick and in a lot of pain that  night but my wonderful hubby as always was by my side and did his best to be comforting.

On this night we had gone to the Cincinnati Zoo to go Caroling there and to walk around.  the kids had fun despite the cold!