Wisdom from my walk

At the closing ceremony for school today the kids were each asked what they want to be when they grow up, Caleb of course said he wants to be a fireman, he has kept with this same dream for at least a year now. but of course when he was younger he said he wants to be a fire truck, this time is he wants to be a fireman driving a firetruck! Two of the girls in his class said they want to be a mommy when they grew up, I cheered loudly for them, I was glad that they thought it a worthwhile dream. This evening I talked to caleb about why the girls wanted to be mommies and told him that women can be anything they want just like men can, that there are women doctors and that women can do most jobs men can. but that theres one job only women can do, and that’s be a mommy. I am glad I am a mommy, and here’s a few reasons why. Most importantly is that I’m loving being a mommy to 3 boys!!

Today I got this on sale for the boys, it’s the step 2 water table. I’ve been wanting a water/sand table but they are pricey. So the other day I go t a $10 off coupon for toysrus if you spend $60. My mom wanted to go shopping for my nephew’s birthday party so I took the coupon, hoping together we could spend that much between presents. So the water table was on sale for $20 and after getting to $60 they took off the $10 coupon so basically I got the water table for $10!! It was a good deal!! We could hear thunder and see some dark clouds when we got home so I set up the water table in the kitchen w/ towels underneath but Bo still managed to have water everywhere and slipped on the floor so we took it outside since it didnt end up raining til just a little bit ago. they had a ball playing with it!

Bo is finally getting over his tactile dysfunction, at least sometimes. Today he even ran and played barefoot in the yard, I was in shock since last week he threw such a huge fit about it! I’m hoping he keeps outgrowing these fears he has about things. Everytime he overcomes something like not wanting to touch playdoh or run barefoot in the grass I get so excited for him that he’s able to enjoy new things.

I could stare at this boy all day and all night if I werent so busy with his brothers!! It’s nice to have time in the evenings to enjoy him all by himself without the chaos of the big brothers. but he’s been sleeping a lot lately, since yesterday actually so I’m not sure what’s up with that. He’s also eating more so I’m thinking he’s in a growth spurt. All I know is I’m hating how fast I’m losing my baby!

and for comparion…this is Bo at about the same age that Zeke is now, they look so similar, if I didnt know better I’d say it was the same kid!!

ready for the big day!

he was standing tall…

and singing his little heart out!

getting his Pre-K completion certificate

the proud parents

it’s better to have had love and lost love than to have never loved at all…or something like that.

Last week a new couple(and their kids) joined our life group study.   they’d been in the area for training for a little while and throughout the night we got to know them better.   They are leaving tomorrow, to head to their home then to move again.   Last week we were amazed at home much Dean and tom had in common.  It was amazing. They have 4 kids, one more than our 3 but pretty close right!?  Dean was bummed that we’d not get the chance to get to know them more, so  on the way home we said we’d have to have them over before they left.   So tonight they came over for dinner and to hang out.
Since there werent as many folks as last week we got to know them some more.  it’s odd how much we do have in common.   They even “argue” with each other like Dean and I do.  it’s hard to explain but if you knew us you’d understand.   I thought Dean was unique, well I know he is, but Tom is so much like him, personality wise it’s strange.   I thought it was just “deaness” but maybe now I’m learning it’s just a personality type, one I’ve never seen in anyone else til now.   It’s pretty cool.

we are sad they have to go and are hoping they make their way back this way soon!!

Something I’ve been working on lately is to try to be a Mary not a Martha.  I am somewhat ocd about a clean house, so ok, I am very ocd about it.   But since hosting game nights I’m getting better at letting dishes sit and hanging out.   Tonight I had a great chance to teach myself to leave the dishes set and to engage in conversation with my guests.   But what really got me to overcome it was the fact that I knew the dishes would be here tomorrow but Angy would not.   It was like a first date, you want to get to know as much as you can about the person so you try your best to talk as much as possible.   ok, we didnt get too indepth since I spent a while teaching her WordPress, but it was still better than doing the darn dishes while she hung out w/ the guys!

I realized after they left as I put those few dishes in the dishwasher that those silly dishes had been eating away at me the whole night, but the reward I got from leaving them there and learning about a new friend was better than the feeling I get at the end of the day looking at my spotless kitchen and house.
So while Angy and Tom will be on their way home tomorrow, I’m glad we got the chance to spend time with them before they went, I hope we both gained from the evening together!!

Tomorrow is the “closing ceremony” for Caleb’s school.   The teacher said they arent allowed to call it a graduation, but they asked that the kids dress in their Sunday best.  For us, that means shorts or jeans!  So wanting our kid to look cute, we went shopping for new clothes.   I knew it would be pricey but he was really excited.  So we went to JCPenney’s and Caleb said he wanted a tie.   To our suprise all of the dress clothes, ties included were on sale.  We got him a set that include, pants, dress shirt and tie for just $5.77!! I’m guessing since they were long sleeves they were trying to get rid of them.  We got a bigger size so next year he has one too!  I am tempted to go back and get a few different sizes as well, since it was so cheap.  Last night we had to go get him shoes though, since the nice outfit wouldnt look so great w/ his beat up tennis shoes.  the shoes were twice the cost of the freaking outfit!!  oh, maybe not, because we did let him get a different tie than what came with the set, cause the ties were 50% off too, so Dean got him this cute spiderman clip on tie!   I’ll put up pics tomorrow after the event, but he’s so excited.  he wanted to wear his “tap” shoes as he calls them to school today but we wouldnt let him!  He’s getting so big, 2 months til his 5th birthday!  My little boys are growing up and its really sad!

my kids are cute but no one is paying me for pics of them!! Sure they say the money is going to charity so I guess that makes it ok?  Geez our world sure is screwed up if people are willing to pay for pics of a family they dont even know personally.  that and the fact people care so much that the media is fighting over these pictures.

it’s not such a bad day considering how I’ve heard people talk about today being cursed.  In the elavator at the hospital where I had my appt today they were talking about it. One lady said it’s not that big a deal, she said the “0” in “06” takes away from it being so bad, that it’s not really 666, it’s 6606!  then a guy said it depends how you look at it, he said some people will say that it’s sunny today while others while say that it’s cloudy, when in fact it’s both!   I was cracking up by the time I got to the floor I needed to be on.  I mean people have really put some thought into it!   I just think it’s funny.

My appt went about as we expected.  He focused on treating my migraines, something that my primary dr already did last week for me and he wants to see me in month for them but I’m  hoping I can just see her( my pcp) since it’s cheaper and I like her better!   he was about to let me leave without even addressing the other symptoms until I mentioned it, at which point he repeated that he doesnt know what it’s from and he’s done all the testing he can for neurological causes and found nothing so I should see my pcp for those symptoms.   So now I have to call her and tell her basically that he said the same thing he said last week so we’re back to square one.   I’m almost to the point where I just dont care.  so far I’m getting through my days ok, some days are much worse than others and I know we dont have the money to keep spending on drs appointments that end the same way, with no information or hope even.   I spent $30 w/ copays and parking for nothing.   I could have used that money on much better things, things we need.  I dont even feel like calling the other dr to talk to her because it seems pointless.   I just wanted some answers and something to make me feel better and it’s not going to happen so why should I bother.  one of my symptoms I’ve had off and on for about 8 years now, and back then I went to an ENT who did tons of testing and found little to nothing.   I’m wondering if that’s who I should go to now for some of this.   I really dont want to do anything.  I mean if it’s not MS then it cant be too big a deal and since I”ve had some of these problems foryears I guess I can continue to deal with it for a while longer.  I’m guessing I’ll always feel this way and never know why.   I just hope sometime soon some of the symptoms go away and I feel like I can live my life like I used to, when things were easy and everything didnt tire me and my days dont end in pain.   one day, maybe that will happen.  until then I think I”m done with doctors.  I just cant keep going and leaving my kids and spending the money when I could be living life and just trying to get through my day.

help!! I dont know what to do!! opt in opt out…I just know we cant afford a higher bill!!!  now or later we are screwed!!!   I am suprised they are actually saying on their site that the stabilization plan will make you pay more money in the long run, it’s like they are admitting they are stealing our money, money they dont even need.   Money I very well need to feed my three kids.   Geez, this is so stupid.   I cant imagine how this is going to affect so many families who are barely making it financially as it is, you know, like us!!   the people who are paying the higher rate up front are doing so becuase they can afford to, meanwhile those who cant afford to pay the increase all at once get screwed and actually end up paying more because they are tacking on interest.  it’s just like credit cards, they give you the money, you go into debt and in the end are poorer than you started out!!  The less fortunate among us get screwed while those who are financially set feel no burden.   I hate how our world works.