Attachment parenting: How would you define it? Well, after reading in our baby books about it, it seems it’s a form of parenting in which the baby is breastfed, co-sleeps with parents, in worn or carried a lot and is geniunely in control of having his/her needs met. Last night after our church group Dean and I were talking about how different we are about caring for Caleb than some other new couples in our group. One couple has a 3 month old and the other an 8 week old I believe. Everytime we meet the one couple barely takes their baby, the 3 month old, out of his car seat. They just let him stay put until he makes a big enough fuss. That blows me away! Especially since they both work so its their time with him, or it should be. The other couple holds their baby but still tends to put her in the play pen and neither couple bothers to check on their child that often. Meanwhile Dean and I are about joined at the hip to our son. The only thing we could think of is that both of those couples are older than us, they are in their 30s while we are still young 20s. The one couple has a son and the other this child is their first.
We don’t meet the definition in all of the baby books for parents that use the attachment style of parenting but I’d say we are very attached to our son. He knows us and we know his needs. He can tell when we are sad or upset. We can tell when he is not feeling well or if he’s ready to get up to sail across the house. I don’t like judging other parents, and do my best not to. But it bothers me so much to see these parents not use that time to bond with their child. I am with Caleb all day long yet I still have problems sharing him with Dean in the evening. When I worked sure I came home and was tired but I still longed to be with my son. I wish I knew what makes parenting so diverse, I mean how different can love be. I can only hope that we are raising our son up in a loving home where he knows he can trust us and that we’ll always be there for each other.
We don’t always carry Caleb in a sling but more often than not we try to if we are going to be doing other things so that he can be with us. That or we just be with him and not do those things. he loves it and we dont have to worry about him crawling around and getting into trouble. I hate to think that some people might think we spoil our son, but in reality we are just doing what feels right. It feels right to pick up our crying son and bring him to our bed if he cant fall asleep in his crib. It feels right to hold him and cuddle him when he could be down playing , because if he wanted to be playing he sure would not let us hold him! I always find it funny to read the baby books because if I am going seeking for advice or things to do with Caleb it usually ends up being pointless because the only suggestions I find are things I already do with him. Things I must just know to do as part of my maternal instinct. Maybe I’m just too in tune with my son, but I’d rather that then have him be lonely and unloved. Funny thing is, all of the loving and holding we do with Caleb, he still spends most of his time exploring and playing. He’s more independent than most babies I know, but then again we don’t let him sit in his car seat for hours on end just because………..
