Wisdom from my walk

Why do I have to be one of those people that seem to have it altogether on the outside then physically get the effects of the stress in my life?  I have another abcess that needs treated by antibiotics, the last time I had one was days before our move and the doctor said if we werent moving that weekend she’d send me to a surgeon and have it cut out, and instead treated it w/ antibiotics.  This one is in the same place and again the doctor doesnt want to do cut it open becuase of it’s location saying it would be worse if they did cut it.   So a week of antibiotics and hopefully this wont affect the scheduled surgery in less than two weeks!   but I think it’s funny, ok, not funny, ironic that this happened now and at the last very stressful time of my life(when we were moving 500 miles w/ three kids!)   Fun times.

Dean thinks I’m going to meet the max on how much we have to spend out of pocket for our insurance again, we did a few years ago, I had so many medical expenses by June or something nutty that after that I didnt have to pay anything that I had met the out of pocket max and I no longer had co-pays for anything.  So while it’s not ideal, but it would be nice to not have co-pays when you go the doctor so often!

Next Monday I see my pcp for a pre-op and that afternoon Bo has speech therapy. Tuesday morning I have an appt at the hospital for other pre-op labwork.   Tuesday afternoon Bo and Zeke have ENT appointments.    Thursday I have my consult w/ the gyn for the hysterectomy.   Then that Monday is surgery # 1.

can you see why I might be stressed?  BUT I have been to curves twice this week and am going to go again in a few minutes.   Yay me!!

So they just called and my nasal surgery is set for Sept 15th. Nothing like getting it out of the way.  Next week I meet to consult about the hysterectomy, so hopefully by the tine I am recovered from the nose thing it will be time to get the hysto.   wohoo!!

Boaz:  I dont like juice it hurts my feelings.

later he went on to justify what he truly meant, it makes him sick and makes him throw up.  Poor kid is sold that water is the only drink of choice for him, other than the occasional banana flavored milk at bedtime!

and even funnier is Zeke now.  I just asked him if he was ready for nap he said yes and asked for some milk to take w/ him.   Yesterday he told me he wanted to go home because he was sleepy.   He’s the only child I know who goes to bed without too much of  a fuss and is aware of his need for sleep.

S0 the ENT wants to do turbinate resection surgery on me.  My nasal passages are small to begin with and my turbinates are swollen taking up more space that already is tight!  The goal of this surgery is to help me breathe more easily so that I can tolerate my CPAP machine better.   This surgery will in no  way cure my apnea, it will just enable me to use the cpap more effectively.   It seems the only thing I can do to rid myself of apnea is lose weight.   or so they keep telling me. 

The question is do I go ahead and try hard to lose weight, get this surgery and see if I feel better then eventually get a hysterectomy and my bone spur/foot surgery, each one of them have an 8 week recovery, during which I can not exercise.  Or….do I get one of these surgeries, and during that recovery get the nasal surgery done if they will then eventually get the other surgery done and lose weight after I’m all healed up from everything?  

I am so confused.   None of these surgeries are emergent, other than the fact they will relieve some pain I am in and eventually help me sleep better.  

I dont know what to do.   They are supposed to call me this week to schedule the nose surgery and next week I have the consult for the hysterectomy.  Its completely up to me as to when to do the foot thing, basically when the pain is unbearable.   Any ideas on what you would do!?

 needless to say I’m a little stressed.  I just want to be pain free and able to sleep.   Sleep would be awesome, but only if it was refreshing sleep!

Since I spent so much of Friday in bed I was up a lot that night.  Once when I woke up and stepped out of bed my foot hurt really badly.  We had plans to go to the opening day of the Renaissance festival on Saturday so I wore my brace to keep my foot pain from getting worse, which just made me feel hotter on an already hot day.  We lasted  a few hours and I was asleep in the van before we left the parking lot because I was so miserable!   I slept all the way home which was good because we had to be at church for tech team that evening.   Yesterday we did church all morning than I got to nap while Zeke did and Dean took Caleb and Bo to the airport playground to meet his parents.   We spent the evening outside talking to neighbors and let the lil’ ones stay up to watch the fireworks but they got bored and when I told them they could go to bed they both went to their rooms and climbed into bed by themselves!

This morning has been boring.  I’ve spent a few hours re-organizing the toys since they’ve been neglected for a while and let Dean sleep in some.   I’m ready to get out of here but am really too tired and there’s not really anything to do!   I guess I should appreciate a quiet day at home since I’m busy every other day this week.

Thank God for friends and family plans! :-)  my father in law came and took Bo this afternoon, and Caleb went to the museum to see the Bodies exhibit w/ my friend and her family. SOOOOO , Zeke took a nap and I was able to take a percocet and nap myself.   Sadly I’m still in pain!   it’s not as bad but it’s still there.   I am going to take some tylenol I guess til my next dose of percocet is due.   First I need to find out if I can take anything else w/ the percocet.   Dean came home early and is working on a computer, Zeke is running around in just a diaper and I’m still in bed from my nap.    It’s pouring down rain and what better place to be then in bed w/ a heating pad!?   (on a Friday night of a holiday weekend?)

If I’m up to it we are going to the Ren Fest tomorrow, I’ve never been to one and every year we say we want to go.   it’s buy one get one free for adults this weekend, and the lil ones get in free so it will fairly cheap for us to go.   Praying I feel better tomorrow!!

I see the ENT on Tuesday to find out what he says about surgery for the sleep apnea issues.    If I could get them to do my foot surgery, hysterectomy and nasal surgery all at the same time I could just have one recovery time….a long one but still…if not I dont know which surgery takes priority.    I need sleep.  I need to be in less pain.    ugh.   I need a new body, maybe Caleb could steal one for me from the Bodies exhibit he’s at!  🙂

Have I mentioned how much I love doctors?  actually today it wasnt so bad.   I was given a prescription for percocet and an appointment on Sept. 11th for a consult w/ another doctor about getting a hysterectomy.   I think I’m ok with that.  I’ve half jokingly been saying it for about a year, that that’s what I need.  Today the doctor came up w/ the idea and agreed I’m in a good “place” for it, i.e.   we cant have more kids for one or reason or another and sadly I’m getting used to that idea.   I went in knowing what my options were and was hoping the “H” word would come up but didnt know some of the things I found out.  Dean will go w/ me to the consult and we hope to make the best decision after that.   The worst part is she didnt think they could do it laproscopicly for a few reasons and if not that means longer recovery.  I cant imagine it being much worse than recovering from c-sections, so I am sure I’ll survive!  Not to mention I recovered pretty fast from those.

until then pain meds if I can tolerate them, it’s that or tolerate the pain.   today is a high pain day, but at least now I can go fill a prescription and possibly get relief, the downside is it will make me even groggier and tired…..and cant take care of kids in my current state so I’m thinking the meds will be reserved for bedtime only