Day #3 and so far I’ve been able to have pretty good communication with Dean. Until today that is. Now when I call his cell I get this lovely greeting: “Due to the hurricane in the area where you are calling we are unable to complete your call, please try again later.” It’s sad and I cant imagine how it would feel to be calling loved ones who lived in that area and not being to find out if they are ok. Tonight Caleb didnt cry for Dean before bed for once, but it may have been because he was too tired. Bo doesnt seem to notice the change much, he’s so carefree he barely cares when I leave him in a room alone. I doubt he’ll be much of a momma’s or daddy’s boy til he’s older and able to care about us more. he’s way too independent and into learning new things about his environment to care about who is around. Although I’m sure he’ll be all grins when he sees Dean again.
My mom called to tell me to watch the news, Dateline was having a special about Katrina. I’ve been hesistant to watch but I knew I need to. I’m in tears again, a family with three kids and one on the way hadnt eaten in a day and were stranded with no gas and a flat tire. I dont know how strong I’d be in that position and I ‘m sure I’d be much more upset than they were. My heart longs to be there, along side Dean doing something. I feel useless here. I hate that life here is going on like nothing is wrong. People are going to work, kids are going to school, all while hours away fellow Americans are in pain and suffering like we could never imagine. I want to do so much more but I know right now I cant. I’ll continue to pray because I know that will help but I really wish there was more I could do. I finally got to see, thanks to the news, where Dean is going and what some of the damage is there. It’s been hit pretty hard too, it’s just not underwater like New Orleans. I’m happy to know that he will helping those who are going through this hard time, but I still know there’s so much more to be done. I am hurting for those hurting and mourning for those who deserve to be mourned, and it’s hard because life is going on here. Tomorrow Caleb has school and I’ll have to meet Bo’s needs then we’ll have life group tomorrow night. It all seems so shallow; there has to be more than this. God help us do what we can to help even when we think there’s nothing we can do.
