I think I am having

I think I am having a nervous breakdown, or some strange reaction to the birth control. My emotions are going crazy, so badly that I went from having such a great day yesterday to being in tears and yelling at Dean. I was mad at him for not helping meanwhile he had made dinner and bathed and fed the baby. I was a mess. I had him call and make me a drs appt for Monday so he can go with me. I think this may be time for me to say I have always dealt with depression and was suprised when things kind of got normal after the baby. But now it seems I am going back to how I used to be, those pregnancy hormones are gone and now the birth control is messing with my body and mind. Not to mention all of the changes around here. At this rate dean will be kicking me to the curb if I dont do something. We have been doing fine lately but yesterday was the breaking point for me,I was even about to call work and say I didnt want the job today because I couldnt handle it, but like Dean had said I needed to go. And I did and now I feel better, for now. We had half a day of work then a Christmas party where I drank more than I should have but I didnt want to be there anyway so I had to do something to make me less tense. Then I came home and cleaned house some and prepared tomorrows lunches, since Caleb and the babysitter were apparently not around. So I finally just called and they are there now so my time of peace and quiet is gone to be replaced with the normal chaos the evening. Pick up Caleb, pick up Dean, run to get baby products, come home make dinner, bath and feed Caleb, pick up Deans brother from the airport…did I mention the inlaws will be here tomorrow!! Argh! Where’s the paxil!!